So… I spent the majority of my night looking through all of my old conversations with my friends(?) that I’ve had on Facebook. I guess I didn’t realize how much more of a “Timeline” those conversations could turn out to be. I’ve been using the site since ’08 – Since I’ve done most of my personal development. That makes for a crazy trip though some very awesome, and very horrible.

I want to say thanks to all those friends who’ve remained friends with me through those years. It’s a pretty great feeling to see that you’ve been right along with me though my years of growth. As for the ones who’ve dropped off the Facebook bandwagon, that’s alright. I hadn’t noticed too many of you missing anyway, and even if I had, we never did talk much in the first place.

Now being done with the prologue, let’s continue on to the real post: How do I balance all of you? The friends, the family, the work, the everything. I don’t understand how my parents can work their 40 hours a week and still find friends to hang out with as often as they do. And I work half the hours they do! My life seems to be consumed by very few things, and that is a terrible thing. I wake up later than I should, I mope around the house, I put xbox on a higher priority than I do dishes or anything else around the house. Like the fact that I’m playing with my friends on xbox makes up for not having any real social life.

I guess I do have a social life. I go out on Thursdays and Sundays. Maybe the days in between if money and situations present themselves correctly. But I long for something more real. I want those friends that are willing to just go out any do things with anytime, like we’re freaking ten years old again. The biggest problem with those friends is… None live near me. My closest friends live an hour away, which is what makes it so difficult to go out and have fun. It requires people.

The only others I “hang out” with are my coworkers, which is fun, but awkward at the same time. I like them, I enjoy the time I do with them, but we’re in totally different friend circles and it feels like the time that we are hanging out happens because it’s just polite, and perhaps even the thing to do when you work with people.

Beyond the physical friendship, I can Skype with friends. Which is cool and all, but what is there to really gain. It doesn’t compare to a face-to-face rendezvous. It might as well just be a phone call – Hell, it IS. The fact that you can’t do much over Skype makes xbox look like a much better decision to waste my day on. At least there I can pretend to have a real life while talking to my real friends.

Bleh… Of course, another blog about me ranting how life is miserable and no answers are coming to mind.