A Blog About Life… Isn't That Unusual?

Just let it go, don’t want to haunt you anymore
I can’t be sure I know just what we’re fight for
I know that you’re scared and that you’re thinking I may go
I’m not leaving, I’m not leaving

And if you’re thinking I might, might be lead astray
Just remember this one question

What if I was nothing? What if this is true?
What if I was nothing, girl, nothing without you
So what if I was angry, what did you think I’d do?
I told you that I love you, girl, I’m nothing without you

I know it’s hard, it seems that we’ve worked at this so long
Soft and foolish pride that tells us we’re not wrong
I hear your voice, you tell me that you’ll never go
And I believe it, I believe it.

And if you’re thinking I might, might be lead astray
Just remember this one question

What if I was nothing? What if this is true?
What if I was nothing, girl, nothing without you
So what if I was angry, what did you think I’d do?
I told you that I love you, girl, I’m nothing without you

And we can keep this going on, we’ll make it work some way
And every step, it makes us stronger every day

And if you’re thinking I might, might be lead astray
Just remember this one question

What if I was nothing? What if this is true?
What if I was nothing, girl, nothing without you
So what if I was angry, what did you think I’d do?
I told you that I love you, girl, I’m nothing without you

What if I was nothing? What if this is true?
What if I was nothing, girl, nothing without you
So what if I was angry, what did you think I’d do?
I told you that I love you, girl, I’m nothing without you.

For the last three years, October has been my month of personal experience, realization, and character building. Seriously, I mean, big things in my life have happened around this month. Some that are seemingly bad, and turn out for the best, and some that are just good to begin with.

Last year, I had probably the most painful break-up of my life. This girl I attempted to date for the most of the year flat out dumped me for childish reasons. Some which are understood, and some that are not. This ultimately lead to be meeting new people, and developing some pretty awesome friendships. This also got me to think heavily about who and what I should be looking into for a partner… I found that. The best relationship I ever had, as mentioned in my previous post, has once again ignited. This relationship still continuing to be the best I’ve ever been. ‘Tis beautiful how this worked out, really.
This was also the time I had quit smoking weed, even if I never really did it in the first place.

Two years ago was an eye opener for me. I realized the friends I had at that time were really… not all that close, and pretty much were using me for what only I could provide. I refuse to be friends with people who are only going to use me, and betray my trust. Thus, I tested my friends, I quit talking to them first to see who would ask me to hang out… I went close to a month before anything happened. Just as I had assumed, my friends were not friends. I decided I was better off a loner than a tool, so I told my “friends” my findings, and gave them an ultimatum: Be real friends, or don’t try.

Three years marks my realization that Alexa’s adoption needed to be dealt with. Her mother and I had a giant fight in my house right in front of Alexa. And that was the realization that I didn’t want my daughter growing up listening to her parents fight, to have to endure the collateral damage that would be done to her from our arguments. I realized that the environment we had set up for Alexa was not a healthy one.

I can’t wait to see what all this October brings for me. It’s already started out flawless, and continues to be so. :)